Haunt was written during the unsettling center of the pandemic. We were all snuggled deeply into the isolation phase and things were quiet. Much too quiet. So achingly quiet, that I started to wonder if I was a tree in a forest and if there were anyone around to hear my wailing, would I even make a sound? Was my existence a thing?
I started to feel that my house was becoming sick of my shit. I was FULLY sick of my own shit.
On top of that, I was traveling back and forth to the farm, where my beloved van is convalescing to do various odds-and-ends work on her and just to get off of the hamster wheel for a while.
The problem was, whenever I would visit the farm during the "before times," it was typically humming with activity. Bodies were everywhere making themselves known. The kitchen was heavy with humid heat, ripe and seasonal produce was being brought in raw, transformed, and rushed out to grateful hands attached to bodies that were either splashing in the creek, dancing on the dirt, or singing to live music in the sheep shed.
The place was always ALIVE.
Unlike this time when I was there alone, sipping bourbon in a stony, silent kitchen with the farm dog, Artemis, reminding me that I'm present enough to provide pets.
Haunt was a way of addressing a deep longing for connection. If we aren't able to move about freely in our lives as we once did, are we any less of a presence in the world?
If this concept doesn't speak to your experience, say, if you quite enjoyed the enforced solitude and reflection, the song can also be a sort of "choose-your-own-adventure" where you could listen to it as if you are being "ghosted" by a love interest.
Either way, I hope you enjoy this one. It was a true companion to me in a period of dark isolation and I'm very proud that it chose me as its vessel into this realm.
lyrics
I haunt this house alone.
Just me
and my bones
and my alcoholism and my dreams
Just me
and my needs
ohh ohh oh
I think of you all the time
the only control I have is
play and rewind
and this house it sings your song
back to me
when nights are long
Ohh Ohh Oh
Catch me now
while you can
while your cameras are on
catch me fast
I am here
But I can't stay long
You catch me in the day
but you never
call my name
and I can see you know I'm there
but you are lonely
and scared
and it's all that I can do
Just to reach you
I haunt this house alone
just me
and my bones
and my habitualism and my dreams
just me
and my needs
ohh ohh oh
And my needs
and my needs
and my needs....
credits
from New Mythologies,
track released February 17, 2023
Acoustic Guitar and Vocals: Emily Zisman
Piano: Emily Zisman
Produced by Kenny Schick at Basement 3 Productions
Emily Zisman is a talented singer songwriter born and raised in the San Francisco Bay Area. Since picking up the guitar at
the tender age of eight Emily’s musical journey has taken her all over the world. She has graced the stages up and down both sides of the United States and has performed internationally at festivals in Europe....more
Emily Zisman is also the singer for Chance's End, a violin-electronica project with music partner Ryan Avery. The album is a large departure from Emily's solo work, but is engaging and full of detail. Emily Zisman
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